A Personal Experience of Jesus Quieting the Storms of Life
I write my personal experience in 2002-2003 of Jesus quieting a storm during my walk on my own path in Christ so that you, the reader, may gain insight, inspiration and encouragement to remain steadfast and grow as you walk on your own path in Christ. May the Lord be glorified above everything in all lives.
I. Scriptural Background
Holy Scripture records Jesus quiets the storm in Matt 8:23-27, Mark 4:35-41 and Luke 8:22-25. The following is my single translation of these passages from the Greek texts.1,2 Red lettering clarifies the meaning of the preceding word in the Greek.3-5
On that day, when evening had come, Jesus said to them, “Let us go across to the other side of the lake (Sea of Galilee).” And dismissing the crowd, the disciples took Jesus with them, as he was already in the ship (fishing boat). Also other smaller ships were with them. So they set sail. A windstorm swept down on the lake creating great raging waves, so that the ship was being swamped. But Jesus was in the stern, asleep on the cushion; and they woke him up and said to him, “Lord (our owner)Matt, Teacher (our instructor in the ways of God)Mark, Master (our authority over us)Luke! Save us! We are perishing! Do you not care?” Jesus got up and rebuked (as he had demons) the wind, and said to the sea, “Silence! Be quiet!” Then the wind ceased, and there was a dead calm. He said to them, “Why are you fearful? Where is your faith?” And they were amazed and filled with great awe and said to one another, “Who then is this, that even the winds and the sea obey His commands?”
The storm described in the passage is a common occurrence on the Sea of Galilee, a lake in Luke and in modern connotation. The climate at the Sea of Galilee is tropical because the lake is located 680 feet below sea level as at the bottom of a giant bowl. It is a wide area within the Jordan River being fed from the north and exiting on the south. Its maximum length is approximately 12 miles from north to south; its maximum width is approximately 8 miles for east to west and it is relatively shallow being on the average 150 feet deep. Within two to five miles of the shore steep hills with deep clefts rise 300 to 600 feet above sea level or upward to 1,300 feet above the lake level. When cold winds blow across these hills and collide with the warm air above the sea, raging storms suddenly upset the calm, reportedly within one-half hour.6-8
Ancient Greek has one word for any vessel that floats and moves through water whether on the Sea of Galilee or the Mediterranean Sea. However in English, the translators have used two words, boat or ship, which may have very different connotation as to size. One normally thinks of boat, being small and used on small bodies of water as the Sea of Galilee, than ship, being large and more appropriate for sailing on large bodies of water as the Mediterranean Sea. Typically the fishing boats were manned by 4 to 6 men and were pointed both at bow and stern with covered area near the stern. A vessel unearthed at the Sea of Galilee and reconstructed in recent years is attributed to the time of Christ and holds fifteen people with a simple single sail. The common English connotation would be boats for these vessels.
Taken literally in the twenty-first century this passage offers little spiritual understanding to one walking with Christ as it reports a one-time occurrence of a physical event. However if one treats Holy Scripture as expressing in human terms actions in the spirit realm, then new spiritual insights can be gained that lead one to learn, change behavior and be improved in Christ as one grows on one’s path. An interpretation for today is the following:
One’s life seems to be in order, and one is walking through a calm period corresponding to getting into the boat and sailing initially. Then suddenly without forewarning one finds one’s self in a furious trial, temptation or persecution corresponding to the raging storm. As one struggles in dealing with the situation, ones faith is challenged and often one feels overwhelmed corresponding to the disciples’ fear that they are in danger. However Christ is with one but not sensed corresponding to Jesus asleep in the stern of the boat. As one prays and cries out to God concerning the Lord’s will in the situation corresponding to the disciples’ waking Jesus, a peace and calm come in due time bringing an increase in one’s faith corresponding to the calm and reaching the destined shore. With calm one also becomes joyful and peaceful until the next storm in one’s life.
II. Personal Background
Before I relate this passage to the recent challenge, i.e. storm, in my life, let me briefly describe my journey in Christ to date.
I believe every person from birth has in them the seed of faith to know God, the Creator. The seed of desire to serve God was awakened in my heart in my pre-teens. Then the only way that I knew to serve God was to be a Roman Catholic priest, so I entered seminary as a freshman in high school. That year didn’t work well but the desire to be a priest remained; so I went back at nineteen for another two years only to realize that the Roman Catholic priesthood wasn’t for me. Also I had become disillusioned with organized religion as I saw it only for controlling the masses and not about a relationship with the Creator. Spiritually I became an agnostic recognizing only a creative force, not God of the Judeo-Christian system. Following my interests in the science-religion dichotomy, I earned an MS in physics coupled with a strong chemistry and mathematics background. My avocation was studying the origins of religious systems from very primitive to creative. Several people characterized me during this time as a seeker of God. For many years God watered and nourished the seed to have it sprout forth at forty-two during a meditation hosted by the Edgar Cayce Association for Research and Enlightenment during which I had a vision of Christ walking ahead and saying come follow me. My heart committed, just as the disciples did in Holy Scripture. At the same time I was considering becoming a priest in the Western Orthodox Church of America being ordained therewith. God continued to water and nourish with pruning what was not good for me to grow in Him and by allowing Evangelical and Pentecostal Protestantism to grow for awhile only to be pruned further to my working with a nondenominational gay church. The Lord continually nurtures and waters for new growth which is pruned for fruitfulness.
When I am in love with someone I want to spend time with that person and generally do what pleases the person. Translating this to my love for Christ, He has asked that I love him with all my heart, mind, strength, and soul. The word all means for me I do not want one iota of self or the world in me as these two are enemies seeking to usurp my love for Christ and the witness He asks me to be for Him to others. Because I often fall short in this, knowingly and unknowingly, I must rely on His mercy for no works of mine can atone for my shortcomings. Thus during my fifty-ninth year, four years ago, my prayers increased in depth in the following order:
Jesus, I want you as my lover first and foremost before a human lover or anything else. If you have some one for me, I want that person to be whom you want.
Jesus, I know that I unable always to do your will; therefore I rely on your mercy and forgiveness to be with you for eternity.
Jesus, I desire to be purified and cleansed in your timing of all things that are not right before you for me alone.
Jesus, I want to minister to others as you ministered in your humanness when here on earth.
Since these prayers, my ministry has broaden to:
Writing on Holy Scripture.
Establishing an outreach to the Leather Community
Retiring from the sciences to concentrate on how I am to be a greater witness for Christ.
III. The Experience
The last of these four prayers became a real challenge for the past 15 months when in June 2002 I met a man, Bel (not the man’s real name), who seemed to want God in his life and offered to do computer work for my ministry. This was not a coincidence but for the Lord’s purposes in both lives. However Bel’s initial desires all changed quickly when he lost his job and decided to return to the cocaine users’ world. As a recovering workaholic and alcoholic I had some experience in dealing with addictions, but not sufficient for my first time with a person addicted to cocaine.
Being a person who trusts one’s word until proven otherwise, I accepted the borrowing of money with the promises of repayment, including a signed statement. Despite what others were saying I was more desirous to be doing the will of Lord for my life. As I continually prayed during this challenge, “Thank you Lord for what you are doing in my life,” I struggled with giving to Bel at the expense of increasing indebtedness, but sensed that Lord’s will was for me to pray blessings by going the extra mile and giving when asked, Luke 6:27-36. At the same time I was seeking balancing passages in Holy Scriptures, but none were coming forth.
The storm worsened when Bel decided that he wanted off cocaine. His struggles against the addiction increased with threats on his life if payments were not made immediately and the desire to use more leading to committing felony forgery and deceptive practices against one of my bank accounts and being arrested. While he was on house arrest with me, the Lord reminded me to be careful not to be the unmerciful servant, Matt 18:21-38. Also I struggled against taking revenge by adding to the arrest charges other fraudulent actions, I remembered from Holy Scripture, “It is the Lord’s to avenge, Deut 32:35.
Having been informed that there was to be no drug usage in the apartment, Bel increasingly used drugs to eventually I had peace to send him back to jail. The Lord confirmed by having a fellow Christian, who had similar experience, educate me on how to cleanse the apartment of drugs while Bel was in jail. A few days later Bel requested to be returned on house arrest but with a change in heart that he wanted Christ in his life. This was understood as against Department of Corrections policy of not returning the same person to one who had requested that the person be removed.
With Bel’s desire to want God in his life, my question become, “What price should one pay for a soul?” After all Christ gave his life for me. Bel is God’s child also. As I live out this challenge what effect am I having on Bel such that the question is, “Am I loving Christ enough to give my own life for Bel’s soul in order that by my example he accepts Christ in his heart and strives to live for Him?” Bel continually struggles with staying attuned to God, just as everyone else does. However I have reminded him that everyone also struggles with this, especially babes in Christ.
Bel having good knowledge of computer security wanted to return to work and with his father and I, he was freed on bail. Upon checking companies that Bel was working for after he did not receive paychecks, they were found not to know of him. My struggle intensified, as I was moving closer to bankruptcy with the promises that Bel would pay on his debt to me and I would not need to file bankruptcy, to where I was crying unto the Lord that I was failing Jesus and Bel in be able to love Bel as Jesus loved when here on earth.
Knowing the Lord is my provider and believing that one is to pay one’s just bills, my prayer was “Lord, I just want the funds to pay my bills and have basic necessities, nothing more.” I sought throughout the challenge to return to employment in my field and related fields, however no doors opened. My financial situation worsened when another person reneged on payments on property. The property was repossessed and sold. Bankruptcy was now the only option. As I proceeded with the filing, I struggled with the thoughts of that this was stealing, even though my attorney told me its only money and a creditor told me that I have valid reasons. I have come to realize that my attitude about paying one’s just bills for me was a hindrance with my relationship with Christ that He wanted it yielded to Him. Sometimes there are seemingly incongruous things that are unrealized idols in one’s life. Remember my prayer is to be purified because of my deep love for Christ, the priceless treasure in my life.
As Bel kept threatening destruction of my second computer tower, I kept giving into demands to protect the second tower. Eventually I could no longer tolerate the lies and deceptions. This led me to ask God to remove Bel and I requested Bel to leave. Finally I stated to the Lord that I would let the second computer tower be destroyed in order for Bel to leave. Again my attitude concerning the second computer tower was a hindrance. With the change in my attitude about the computer tower, Bel started wanting to make it correct and agreeing to find other living arrangements.
Throughout this challenge has been the question, “Is this an attack by Satan to destroy my walk in Christ and ministry?” Scripture says that Satan desires to destroy the works of God in one’s life and uses people to work through. My thoughts and actions concerning this question was to remember that Christ forewarned that those who love Him would be persecuted and to stand firm knowing that Christ will bring one through stronger for the works of Satan have been defeated already. I came to understand that the attack was true by Bel’s comments after entering recovery that no matter what he tried to do against me I did not change.
Eccl 3:1-8 reminds one that there is a season, which has a beginning and an end, for everything and that this chapter was closing for the work was completed that was to be accomplished through this challenge. Although I knew the end was at hand, there were times of frustration requiring waiting on the Lord’s timing. This waiting provided for growth in perseverance and patience. When completed in the Lord’s time, there is joy, peace, and no regrets for all had been accomplished.
There were times when peace and joy were returning and the desire for greater praise and worship type of service has increased. Also others are being met who have an interest in my leather outreach as I completed the article “Leather Play Reflects the Walk with Christ,” and additional tracts were written in my Encouraging Words for Life Series. In addition Bel worked with me to put together a website, www.christianbear.org, that has been linked internationally. Intertwined with this were times of great frustration and anger when computer passwords were changed and not shared along with books I was using for reference in writings being taken and not returned as promised, the latter having to be replaced.
How has all of this affected Bel? He has repeatedly related seeing a genuineness in my walk in Christ both by example and speech giving Bel concern for his soul leading to encouragement and impetus as he walks his own path to pray, read Scripture and seek the milk of the Word as needed by a babe in Christ. Using these acts and acknowledging a little faith in Christ enabled Bel to realize he was too weak to take the easy way and commit suicide because he felt useless and worthless despite being affirmed otherwise.
Realizing that Christ was with Bel and had work for him, Bel started to see Christ working in his life when he was able to be in detox for seven days instead of the normal 3 days. From this experience he expressed the desire to enter a live-in recovery program. However being fearful and not yet ready to give up totally his self-sufficient ways, he delayed until the realization that he was going to be homeless as provisions by others was drying up. Thus in October 2003 he entered into a drug abuse treatment program with goal to live and be the productive person whom Christ called Bel to be. He has seen by doing so the blessing of the Lord and is expressing new ways of living life and realizing that only he must change, not everyone else for him. Spiritual ministry continued on friendly terms until he no longer contacted me as he returned to the drug culture.
Because Christ has forgiven me of my immense indebtedness to Him, His power acting in me enables me to forgive Bel of all his indebtedness to me whether financial, emotional and spiritual. Thus Bel leaves totally unencumbered.
Christ says I will not leave you or forsake you and to be content with food and clothing. This was true as many physical items were taken, and financial conditions were put into jeopardy.. The Lord provided the finances for the essentials of an apartment, food and laundry. Utilities were sometimes paid just in time to avoid being cut-off, and key financial conditions were sustained. Without having gone through this experience I would not have experienced seeing God’s provisions in actually and being more than knowledge.
As I shared my challenge, the Lord blessed me with many to encourage and support me. Special thanks and blessing from the Lord to Bob, Doug, Jacki, Jeffrey, Ken, Nancy, Phil, Roy, Stephen, Victor, and the many others who heard my prayer requests and stood by me in prayer support. Most especially I have come to realize how God keep me as I stayed close to Him during this challenge.
References
1The Interlinear KJV Parallel New Testament in Greek and English Based on the Textus Receptus with Lexicon and Synonyms, George Ricker Berry, Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, MI
2The Zondervan Parallel New Testament in Greek and English (based on Nestle’s Greek New Testament), Zondervan Bible Publishers, Grand Rapids, MI, 1975
3The New Strong’s Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible, Thomas Nelson Publishers, Nashville, TN, 1995
4Zondervan NIV Exhaustive Concordance, 2nd Ed, Edward W. Goodrick and John R. Kohlenberger III, Eds., Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, MI, 1999
5A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament, Joseph Henry Thayer, Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, MI
6Reader’s Digest Atlas of the Bible, An Illustrated Guide to the Holy Land, The Reader’s Digest Association, Inc. Pleasantville, New York, 1981
7The Gospel of Matthew, Vol. 1, William Barcaly, The Westminster Press, Philadelphia, PA, 1975
8Fishing in the Lake of Galilee from Everyday Life in the Holy Land by James Neil, http://www.lightofword.org
ã 2003 Christ the Master Ministries
Contact: Jerome V. Scholle
Email: jscholle@christianbear.org